wonderland.
if i had a world of my own, everything would be nonsense. Nothing would be what it is, because everything would be what it isn't. And contrary wise, what is, it wouldn't be. And what it wouldn't be, it would. You see? -alice in wonderland
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poyzn:

This is like installing Windows on a Mac.

(via fuckdinthehead)

pavlovs-schrodinger:

pavlovs-schrodinger:

when im older and my kid needs me to sign something for school im just gonna write “Dad” in really crappy handwriting so it seems like my kid forged my signature and the teacher calls to tell me and im just “yes no it is i dad”

i posted this when i accidentally took too much medication

screw you guys

(Source: birdschoolforbirds, via fuckdinthehead)

dickflavouredsoup:

her eyes were the colour of

image

(via fuckdinthehead)

smilingslowly:

spookywhiteghost:

fuckinglesbian:

princessnausicaa:

my mom tried to teach our goats to pee in one certain spot by giving them treats when they’d pee in that spot

except that

they think that now whenever they pee they get a treat

so whenever they see my mom

they pee

 laughed for a solid five minutes

behaviorism gone wrong

Pavlov is laughing in his grave

(via fuckdinthehead)

carryonmy-assbutt:

fricklesfrackles-letsfrickackles:

domina-domina-omnimalum:

thebabbagepatch:

hereghostyghosty:

jordaamn:

johnstridur:

adriofthedead:

thesunmaid:

parents making sex jokes

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grandparents making sex jokes

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nine-year-olds making sex jokes

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nine-year-olds

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NINE

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NEIN

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image

image

Welcome to tumblr where we go from parents making sex jokes to sassy Hitler in 0.6 seconds

(via fuckdinthehead)

lolsomeone-actually:

district12er:

unclefather:

panelling:

cootertooter:

sunsandsurfsoul:

fishgingers:

i once chipped a tooth while making out when i was 15

I once bit a guy’s dick because I told him not to force his dick down my throat and he did

I once dated and kissed a girl to hide my sexuality

a leopard can carry twice its bodyweight up a tree

Ants are really strong

Where is this post going?

Home

(Source: xhoe, via fuckdinthehead)

octobra:

if you step on the back of my shoe and it comes off I will do the same thing to ur head

(Source: youtubeofficial, via fuckdinthehead)

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